British Foreign Office Apologizes After Proposing Pope Bless Abortion Clinic, Officiate At Gay Marriage Ceremony, And Introduce Line Of Papal Condoms

An upcoming visit by Pope Benedict XVI to Britain scheduled for September may now be cancelled, that after a leaked “official” document from a committee within the British Foreign Office satirizing the Pontiff and the Catholic Church suggesting that on his official visit he bless an abortion clinic, officiate at a gay marriage ceremony, and that a line of papal-endorsed condoms be introduced – the “Benedict.” According to the Foreign Office, the memo was confidential, and was merely the beginnings of brainstorming session by a committee set up to ensure the Papal visit was well executed, and was not, according to Office, an official Government policy. Buried in the three page memo, are suggestions that the Pope formally apologize to the victims of sexual abuse, asking that the Pope take a “harder line on child abuse – announce sacking of dodgy bishops, announce whistle-blowing system for child abuse cases, and launch helpline for abused children.” The individual responsible for the memo has reportedly been transferred to other duties, and has been told that this was a “serious error in judgement,” a determination he has accepted. Officials have apologized to the Vatican, but it is unclear whether the trip will continue as planned or whether it will be cancelled.